Monday, May 15, 2006

No. 187 - It's Square to be Hip

I’ve always been a bit of a fashion victim. By that I mean I’m usually trying to keep up with the new trendy styles, but fall short due to funds; access to said trends (Nebraska has never been know for setting any trends unless you count the rage from a couple years ago for women to wear bandannas; a trend set by my mother 30+ years ago to cover her curlers when out milking cows); and thighs that don’t seem to want to fit into the latest and greatest slim-fitting jeans – tell me – is anyone wearing these? And loving it?

Then the news hit that it was fashionable to adopt Chinese babies. Or for that matter, international adoption, with China being a popular destination for the “rich and famous”. The pashmina’s seemingly casual appearance with strapless gowns was finally ousted by the Ultimate Baby Wrap, designed in fabrics reminiscent of the baby’s home country. Again, short of funds; access to said babies; and a husband who moaned that I had too many wraps already, put me at the short end of the fashion stick.

Then lo! What should be in Sunday’s paper from The Metro? An article about how being pregnant has usurped Manolo Blahnik with its fashion statement value (and may even be cheaper than a closet-full of Blahniks). Unfortunately, this is only a blip from the article, but the picture speaks a thousand words, doesn’t it? But I have a way around this one, and it doesn’t include me having to borrow my Asian neighbor’s baby for nights out on the town. Nope. I can actually create my own sympathy belly at home out of the now passé’ bandanas and pashminas. AND, best of all, inclement weather will no longer catch me off guard as I can always reduce my appearance to, say, 6 months gestation, if the wind picks up. I can’t wait to show off my new look tomorrow at work!

15 Punches:

At 9:10 AM, Blogger Cricket said...

There are limits to my fashion consciousness.

Heck, I have the belly now just waiting to be painted. Since endo treatments began over a decade ago, I understand the dreaded and mortifying, "So how many months along are you?" (Then I kind of sieze and moths fly out my ass. That must be where my son got the idea.)

So you aspire to hear, "And how many bandanas are you along?"

You are cutting edge.

 
At 9:18 AM, Anonymous Erin said...

Hip to be round?! Gak.

 
At 9:35 AM, Blogger soralis said...

Hip to be round... So I guess us infertiles aren't to hip then! Hmm does a fat belly count maybe I am hip afterall?? :)

 
At 9:39 AM, Anonymous Kath said...

"Fashion statement value." That thinking makes me absolutely sick. Is there any degree of crassness the world hasn't figured out yet? I know I'm tempting fate with that question.

 
At 9:47 AM, Blogger Well-heeled mom said...

Isn't Nebraska the home of the huge and world famous Cabela's??? I'm pretty sure that's where I send my Cabela's credit card payment each month. No sky miles cards in my family, nosireee. We get points towards free Cabela's merchandise! Yippeee!

I'd think it would be easy to be a trendsetter with a Cabela's warehouse right in your own backyard!!!

 
At 10:09 AM, Anonymous Molly said...

Oh, dearest DD, you're GAW-jus just the way you are.

 
At 11:24 AM, Blogger Alli said...

LOL - I HATE the skinny jeans. A tightly tapered leg is not flattering! I am stubbornly resisting that trend.

Thank you, also, for your sweet comment on my blog the other day. :)

 
At 11:32 AM, Anonymous Tracy said...

See, now...there's hope. If THIS season's hot thing is being pregnant, then does that mean NEXT season's hot thing is stretch marks, un-lost baby weight, and the harried, un-kempt look of a new parent? Because, if so? Yeah, TOTALLY got that one going. So what if my kid is 12, teenagers are almost like newborns...

~Tracy

 
At 11:39 AM, Blogger One Mother's Journey said...

So what exactly is the gestation length of the bandana? Hip indeed.

 
At 1:55 PM, Blogger Pamplemousse said...

Skinny jeans are so past it now! It is the flare coming back or the boyfriend look like you pinched your boyf's Levi's. You know, all baggy round the arse and legs.

Me? I am still clinging to my bootcuts to balance out my arse. Mind you, that is a moot point at the moment as I have not been dressed or out of the house since Saturday!

PS I still love my pashminas. Nothing like them for snuggling on a plane ride. Better than those nasty airline blankets. Eeeew.

 
At 3:37 PM, Blogger Beagle said...

Maybe this explains my problem . . . I have never been fashionable.

 
At 5:45 PM, Blogger Spanglish said...

ugh. I hate the fashion industry.

 
At 8:57 PM, Blogger Sarah said...

I guess days in the same lululemon outfit doesn't count as high fashion!!

 
At 11:11 PM, Blogger Millie said...

Both sets of What Not to Wear folks are solidly against skinny jeans for almost everyone. So I listen to them.

I do, however, still love a good pashmina. Just so useful. Unlike any poncho. Hate those.

 
At 10:23 PM, Blogger Beth said...

Damn, I knew I should have worked harder trying to fit in with the popular crowd in my younger days - perhaps I set a bad precedent by refusing to sport the Farrah Fawcett 'do back in the day?

 

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