No. 153 - Goodbyes

No, not from me, not just yet. I'll explain in a little bit. But first...

Transfer BlahBlah:

We had to get up again at 4:15 a.m. so I would have enough time for my acupuncture pre-transfer appt. I didn't sleep well last night as my asthma is preventing me from breathing comfortable without the rasping of air in and out of my lungs. Plus, Mr. DD had a confrontation with both my mother and his sister last night that left him (as well as myself) a little wound up with emotions. Sleep did not come easy for either of us. More on that in a separate post.

I didn't have enough time between the acu appt and the actual transfer to have a very full bladder. However, nothing that Dr. Samelastnameasme couldn't solve by pushing REALLY HARD on my bladder during the transabdominal ultrasound while Dr. Blinksalot transferred the four embryos. Two were 8-celled, grade 3. Two others were transferred that were still at the 4-cell stage (slackers!). Dr. Blinksalot thought the two 8-celled looked "great" and it just makes me wonder how come they were only a grade 3. That's why I mentioned the grading being such an arbitrary system.

The transfer was definitely not as painful as the one in December, which left me cramping for hours. I'm also trying to be more compliant about the bedrest, but still felt it was completely unnecessary for me to be taken to my car - not in a wheelchair - but laying on a gurney. I told the young man who trollied me to the exit that a good practical joke would be to cover me with a sheet like a corpse. He thought that would be funny, too, but not necessarily a good "career" move. Even the phlebo found me to be in such good attitude that he really wished for this IVF to work for me. It was odd to have a stranger, a man, telling me that he hoped I would get pregnant, but I figure it happens all the time in blogging and he was so sincere so I ate some more chocolate in his honor as well.

After my post transfer acu appt, we headed home. I slept through the valium until about 4:30 this afternoon. Since then I've been having to keep Mr. DD motivated about playing with X and not falling asleep next to me as I'm sure if he did I would find myself taking care of X, whether that was fixing him supper or going outside to play: neither conducive to my goal of staying in bed for 24 hours.

My beta is schedule for the 25th. If this doesn't work, I will have to seek resolution to this whole 2nd baby thing and move on. Which brings me to the Goodbyes.

I don't think I will necessarily stop blogging as my family angst around here will certainly provide another 6 months of fodder. But some very special bloggers made announcements in their recent posts that they are going to stop writing. One in particular is bittersweet: Suz over at Within the Woods is finding the joys of two wonderful pooping babies pleasantly occupying. She is why I am here; an inspiration and a powerful example of spirit and determination. Also, Chris at Barefoot And... is obviously hurting and has announced her need for a break. I can completely relate to her frustrations and pain of SIF, and I will miss her wonderfully snarky takes on the events around her.

I hope it's not "goodbye", but "see you later" for these two.


Personal factoid: I have a mole on my cheek that now looks like a beauty mark that I worry will someday sprout that one scary long hair.