Thursday, April 27, 2006

No. 174 - What Has Sucked in the Past 24 Hours

1.) Mr. DD finally accepts the fact that the IVF did not work and breaks down in tears when he picked me up for lunch yesterday.

2.) The picture of the 4 embryos fell off the fridge where I had it hidden from company the other day. It fell face up. I don't know what to do with the picture.

3.) I picked a few things out of the spare closet to give to a coworker who is 13 weeks pregnant. It was maternity clothes I've been holding onto for the past 4 years. I have loaned them out once before. This time I am giving them away for good.

4.) One of my favorite episodes of Seinfeld was on (the one where George pretends to be a marine biologist and pulls a golf ball out of a whale's blowhole), and my few moments of happiness were ruined when the episode from Friends comes on and it's where Chandler and Monica find out that they either need to go with a surrogate or sperm donor (which makes no fucking sense if the doctor is telling her she has a "hostile uterus") or adoption.

5.) I was in the flow of optimism exactly a week ago as I looked forward to a weekend away. I am now in the ebb of pessimism: my period started. CD1 use to give me an odd sense of relief as it usually meant we were advancing to our next cycle, our next chance. Now it's just the beginning of a period; the end of our ART.

Please tell me that someone has had something GOOD happen to them in the past 24 hours. What was it?

25 Punches:

At 9:38 PM, Blogger Cricket said...

Nada here, but I'll be checking back for an uplift... if someone posts.

 
At 9:41 PM, Blogger K&M said...

I was offered the job I interviewed for. P/T, 1-2 days a week, during school hours. Not a lot of money, but ME money. That's a kinda good thing...

 
At 9:57 PM, Blogger soralis said...

I am so sorry you are having such a crappy day... I hope your days get better.

Take care

 
At 5:45 AM, Blogger Catizhere said...

We woke up this morning on the "right side of the grass" as my grandpop used to say. That's good right?

You realize that there are people out here in the world who have NEVER met you who love you anyway,
and wish you all the peace that you can handle.

 
At 6:26 AM, Blogger Trish said...

My daughter, who's not supposed to do or say much, said "go" quite plainly and with intention along with a signing video I bought her.
I didn't smoke a single cigarette all day yesterday.
I think that's all I've got

 
At 6:45 AM, Anonymous Molly said...

Ummmm . . . I applied for a new job, and things look good on that front. We visited a condo for sale that I loved and my husband didn't -- so I guess that's actually not good news, nevermind. Umm . . . it's Friday?

Still thinking of you, D.

 
At 6:53 AM, Anonymous Kim said...

I haven't had a chance to speak up really here but I wanted to tell you how sad I am for you. I can't even guess how ard this must be and I admire you for the courage to get off the ride at this point. Thank you for sharing your feelings with us, it must be difficult.

 
At 7:08 AM, Blogger Thalia said...

Don't have a lot to contribute, I'm afraid. It's a nice day though, sunny and some nice puffy white clouds. Daffodils are still in bloom.

 
At 7:39 AM, Blogger Sarah said...

Sorry that things are so sad for you right now-hope that things start to look a bit brighter soon!

 
At 8:14 AM, Blogger goldmoon said...

My basal chart still isn't showing ovulation after 25 days...wait, did you say positive?! Oh. Uhm...I can have some wine this weekend if I want??

 
At 8:26 AM, Blogger kati said...

I like the "it's friday" comment, friday evenings have always been my favorite day/time of the week. Plus, the sun is shining here in the Northwest!

I remember my most expensive period. It couldn't even wait for the beta (it started between the blood draw and the call. It still makes me teary)?! It sucks so much that you have to go through this.

 
At 9:02 AM, Blogger jennster said...

i'm so sorry.. him in tears would kill me. but um, it's actually sunny here in the bay area, AND WARM. and it hasn't done that since november. seriously!
i don't know.. there's always an upside with things, even when we can't see them right away. i feel for you and wish i could you a big hug.

 
At 9:39 AM, Blogger Well-heeled mom said...

Regarding Friends? When I was waiting and waiting and WAITING for my adoption to end - and facing the holidays with my son 2079 miles away in an orphanage - Monica and Chandler got called ON Thanksgiving Day with news that they were chosen to be adoptive parents. Yeah, good timing.

I'm sorry about all that has happened. Good things? None that would be life changing. The Boy did run to the window when I dropped him off at preschool and blow me kisses, though! Oh! And since he turned 4? A different kid. Much better behavior. I guess maybe it is a terrible three thing after all!

Have a good weekend!

 
At 12:12 PM, Anonymous Erin said...

Um, I got my house cleaned so that my IL's can come visit today. Does that count?

I am so, so sad for all your family is going through right now.

 
At 12:29 PM, Anonymous Erin said...

Hey, d. thinking of you like mad today.

 
At 12:52 PM, Anonymous Just a reader said...

There are a lot of things to be thankful for! Spring in here, the sun is shining (at least I hope it is where you are).
Freshly cut grass, daffodils, the smell after rain, the sound of waterfalls, getting a decent tan, chocolate, fresh fruit, yugurt smoothies...a lot to be thankful for indeed!
I wish you very best in the world! Remember to take ten minutes every day to count your blessings! I mean...imagine our world without flushing toilets, or tampons! The world is truly wonderful!
I hope I have sent a few good vibes your way!

 
At 1:40 PM, Anonymous TB said...

I completed my review with my boss without blurting out Tourette's-style that I will be leaving in two months :o)

Hang in there DD. We are all behind you.

 
At 1:42 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

I've been thinking about you as Brenda had her baby, since I know you read her blog, and I knew it had to hurt. But her having her baby, when she for so long thought she'd never have kids, is a good thing.

I got to spend a night out last night with my man - the man who I broke up with a few weeks ago, and thought it was OVER over with. And yet we're working on things.

Life is hard. You don't get through it without bumps, bruises, and tears. But that's a good thing. The bad teaches us to appreciate the good, sometimes. Others, it makes us just want to go punch a clown.

~Tracy
(formerly of about damn time)

P.S. I think I need a blog again, so I can stop saying "formerly of..." ;-)

 
At 1:45 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

And also - I have NO IDEA where '1918' came from in that comment.

SO...

whatevah.

~Tracy

 
At 1:46 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

And now it doesn't say 1918, it says a different combo of numbers/letters.

Blogger is messing with my head!!!!

LOL.

Happy Friday, too.

~Tracy

 
At 3:21 PM, Anonymous Kath said...

Dear DD, I have nothing really good to offer from my day, but at least nothing bad happened. That is my pathetic offering.

I'm thinking of you, my dear, and of Mr. DD.

 
At 3:58 PM, Blogger Suz said...

Let's see, something good. I had some chocolate. It was tasty.

 
At 9:15 PM, Blogger MAMB said...

I'm a lurker...I just wanted to say I'm very sorry for what you are going through.
My good thing for the day: the adoption agency I wanted to use finally started taking new clients again.

 
At 7:02 AM, Anonymous Ann marie said...

I do not have anything amazing to report, but I'd like to mention a few good things: chocolate, vanilla ice cream with chocolate chunks and caramel, music, shopping sprees, pets who just know you had a shitty day and come along to nudge you into feeling better, winning the lottery, finding a parking space at the mall right by the entrance, margaritas...I can go on.

I'm sorry for the crap you are going through...

 
At 6:27 PM, Anonymous Mary Scarlet said...

I'm sorry, DD, and #1 just breaks my heart. For #2, I bought myself a beautiful little book and tucked all such pictures away with a note. I could have left it in my IVF file but this felt better. Thinking of you both.

 

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