Tuesday, January 10, 2006

The Joys of Baby-Shower Gift Shopping

Over my lunch today, I decided I better go find a baby-shower gift for my niece-in-law for Sunday so I skipped merrily over to Target and with the assumption that she had registered at every baby-related area in Small Town (List: Target only), and I printed out her gift list. I found some things that were all grouped in one location and confidently picked up an assortment of activity toys and jauntily headed for the wrapping paper and gift bag area to make sure our gift was appropriately attired.

As I stood staring at the cute little bags and bows and pink, yellow, blue and green paper, I felt…something. Almost indiscernible, but as I wondered from the paper to the bags and back again in perpetual pace of indecision, IT became more noticeable.

Just fucking GREAT!

I snagged my first choice of wrapping and threw it into my cart and headed over to toiletries. I needed a new toothbrush, some contact solution, facial cleanser, and because I knew I had nothing in my purse or drawer at work, some tampons.

I found the feminine products isle and cruised past the OPK and HPT with only a slight hesitation and found what I was looking for. By that time I was trembling in fury and cursing the unfuckingfairness of it all. I thought I was going to have to resort to Julie’s Temptation of a Period, but I should have known shopping for baby-shower gifts would trump any white panty/white jogging pant/new bed linen combo. No offense to you, Julie, as your idea was brilliant, but mine?! Well, do I need to say more? No, all it took was gift shopping for baby stuff wearing one of my finest CK underwear to bring on Cycle Day 1.

Or is it Cycle Day 37? That would make me 5 weeks and 2 days, so it’s the end of my pregnancy; beginning of my miscarriage; beginning of my FET cycle. Gosh! Who knew One Day could be the end and the beginning of so many exciting opportunities.

fuckityfuckfuckmotherfuckercocksuckersonofabitch…I hate this! I’m too mad to even cry. Sure, I knew this was coming, but it doesn't suck any less.

14 Punches:

At 12:04 PM, Blogger Cricket said...

That just sucks.

Did you see the pictues of Mischa (sp?) Barton this week at places like PerezHilton.com? She had deep red crotch spots on the front of her white stretch pants. For the world to see!

I guess hers held other significant emotional consequence and yours isn't lost on me. I hope you get through this in one piece. I know you will.

 
At 12:22 PM, Anonymous Molly said...

Shit, DD. And while shopping for baby gifts, nonetheless. Touche, DD's uterus. Well played.

Well, moving forward, I guess. Good luck.

 
At 12:49 PM, Anonymous erin said...

Oh my. That really does suck.

It appears as though irony is in full-swing these days.

 
At 1:35 PM, Blogger Catizhere said...

I am loving you string of swear words!! My boss (yeah, HER, of the evil, mean spirit) has a curse word SONG that she sings....Assshitmotherfuckerballscocksuckertitsandfuckityfuck.
Kinda funny when she sings it... guess you have to be there.

Anyway, yeah. uh, moving on.

 
At 2:29 PM, Blogger Ova Girl said...

DD I am so sorry.I know how bitter this experience is and nice one Aunt Flo for the touch of irony (gah!) I hope the FET brings you success. hang in there.

 
At 3:23 PM, Blogger K&M said...

Damn it all to hell. I am so sorry. Doesn't a good long cuss feel good sometimes?

 
At 4:25 PM, Blogger LeggyP said...

Ugh- I'm sorry. I wish I had words to say to make it better.

 
At 7:56 PM, Anonymous Mary Scarlet said...

Really fucking shitty. Timing, and everything altogether. Your nurse is wonderful, however, glad for her. I'm sorry DD.

 
At 9:11 PM, Anonymous Kris said...

There's just no denying how shitty that is. There's just no way around- our bodies find the most creative, evil ways of tourturing us...

 
At 10:45 AM, Anonymous mm said...

Oh how awful. As if shopping for shower gifts could be any more painful.

To answer your q about nurses: My husband ran into the IVF nurse from our last clinic when he was out with his friends one night. She was SHITFACED and decided that she had to have my husband call me so we could all talk... Kept going on about how sorry she was for my failed cycle and btw did we know anyone we could set her up with? The whole experience was simultaneously scary and hilarious.

 
At 12:49 PM, Anonymous Kath said...

That does suck, DD. Unspeakably. I'm so sorry.

 
At 5:14 PM, Blogger Spanglish said...

Reading this post made my stomach clench.

Our cycles are cruel.

 
At 10:07 PM, Blogger Julie said...

I'm sorry.

 
At 2:47 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hello-De-Lurking on this post since I couldn't get a comment on the 1/11 post. Just wanted to say that I saw your comment in Cecily's site and noticed that you were in NE, as am I (omaha) and came here to see what was going on-I've read/skimmed most of your posts today. I don't consider myself an infertile-one miscarriage 8/05, been off the pill since 9/04 and nothing yet, but haven't tried any other 'methods'. It certainly is a roller coaster and I haven't experienced even a fraction that you have. Anywho-I feel for you and the ups and current downs you're experiencing.

G.

 

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