Ingorance = Fertile

Friday’s visit to Dr. V., a local OB, to discuss the follow thru of our next cycle’s IUI, was uneventful to say the least. The most notable experience was when Max and another little boy discovered my unattended hot coffee and purse while I was at the receptionist desk explaining something about my insurance. Max comes up to me holding a wrapped tampon and asked, “What is this?” Of course, the other waiting patients, receptionist, and anyone else within hearing distance all found it funny enough to giggle, but with respect to my embarrassment, no out-and-out guffaws.

The only thing I could think of to tell Max was that it was Mommy’s and someday, I would tell him. I’m hoping I didn’t take the wimpy way out. However, that’s when I realized that not only had Max been in my purse, but so too a little tot of about 18 months who managed to get my $4 coffee spilled all over his socks. His mother dashed over immediately (where the hell was she a minute ago!) and ripped off his socks when I mentioned that the coffee was probably hot. It really wasn’t, but I thought she needed a good scare.

By the time we got into the room, 40 minutes had passed and with a busy 3 ½ year old, it might as well have been 4 days as he went from being tired, hungry, thirsty, bored, to tired, thirsty, hungry, bored, etc., every 5 minutes. All this to hear Dr. V. say that he would go ahead and follow Dr. M’s (my RE) “protocol” for the next IUI cycle. Yeah, I should’ve asked what exactly did he mean because I got the impression that they do not do the lab work which can tell if the drugs are messing with my estrogen or not, but instead they use the ovulation predictor kits (OPK). I guess I’ll take a wait-and-see attitude from here.

Saturday night I had the onset on the most horrific headache I have EVER had in my life! I took some Advil and went to bed. I woke up nearly every hour with my head pounding and feeling pretty sick. At 4:30 a.m. I had to have Jerry get me two more Advils as I couldn’t get out of bed. I stayed in bed all of Sunday morning taking an Aleve at 9:30 a.m. By noon I had had enough and Jerry drove me to the local urgent care. It wasn’t busy so I was quickly seen by a very sweet doctor who was completely empathetic to my plight as of course I had to give her my recent medical history down to starting the Pill 2 weeks ago. She diagnosed me with “hormonal headache” and suggested I quit the Pill. After she said it I’m sure she had wished she hadn’t as I was bawling like a baby. How could I stop the Pill if I wanted the cysts to go away? Why did my hormones have to rebel against me in such a malicious manner? I did, however, get 2 very painful shots in the hip that left me with quite a pleasant buzz for the rest of the day. Ah…the power of narcotics!

I’m so sick of the reminders of infertility I could scream and scream. The evening my headache came on I was over at a friend’s house who had a bunch of people over for a college game. One of the girls there, who doesn’t know me or the problems we are having with conceiving, told this story about one of her friends who had sex with her husband 7 times in one night so they could get pregnant. It took every ounce of will power not to bitch-slap her. It wasn’t her fault, she was just telling the story. But come on! Are people, adults for that matter, that seriously ignorant?!

Unfortunately, it appears that being stupid and ignorant is a sign of fertility. Of course, that’s coming from someone who thinks she’s fairly bright and informed and INfertile!